As this student’s school counselor, I’ve had the privilege of watching them grow and navigate the complicated journey of adolescence. What happened on “Senior Prank Day” was deeply disappointing and caused real harm—there’s no denying that. But I want to acknowledge something else just as important: the courage and integrity it took for this student’s father, Mr. Clow, to share such a raw and honest reflection with our community.
Too often, we see families retreat in the face of discipline or controversy. Mr. Clow instead chose to step forward, not to excuse the behavior, but to reflect on it, confront it and model what it means to take ownership and grow. That, too, is a teachable moment.
Mistakes, especially in our teenage years, do not define us. How we respond to them does. This student faced serious consequences and a great deal of public accountability. And yet, they showed remorse, took responsibility and accepted the gravity of their actions. The family did not ask to be let off the hook. They asked to be heard, to be held accountable and to be given the chance to make things right.
As educators, we strive to nurture academic achievement, but also character, compassion and growth. Sometimes the most meaningful lessons are not taught in classrooms, but in hard moments like this one.
I also want to acknowledge that not every student or family has the ability—or the access—to be heard in the same way. Over the years I’ve witnessed students from more privileged backgrounds walk at graduation despite serious infractions, while others—often from historically marginalized communities—face harsher scrutiny with fewer avenues for advocacy. That disparity is real. And while I’ve seen a genuine effort in recent years to do better, if we’re truly committed to equity we must continue to confront these patterns with honesty, humility and an ongoing willingness to grow.
We’re all still learning—educators, families and systems alike. I hope this letter serves as a powerful reminder of both personal accountability and the broader work still needed to ensure fairness for all our students.
To Mr. Clow and the family: Thank you for reminding us that parenting—and growing up—is messy and hard, but always worth the effort. Your vulnerability and commitment to doing better speak volumes. I believe your student has learned from this. I know I have.
—Mr. Ever Flores
School Counselor, Healdsburg High School
To better understand the “real harm” that was done by this prank, it would help to know what was written on the underclassman’s vehicle. We don’t need the exact words but the gist of it would allow us to consider weather the initial punishment was appropriate or if the successful appeal was justified. Bullying? Racial or gender slurs? Or something else?